The biggest, worst of all time, end of times, Frankenstorm is coming to East Coast.

Surely you have already heard by now, the “largest storm of all time” is currently heading up the ocean to destroy the East Coast, which includes cities such as Philadelphia, Baltimore, Washington D.C., and New York City. Do you know what those cities have in common?

They’ve all been around since like the 16th century. But no matter, as of this Tuesday, according to all the media, weathermen, newschicks, CNN, Foxnews, the shitty Baltimore Sun, all of these cities will be completely eradicated. They’ve been through wars which resulted in our Independence and the end of slavery, but in all those years, no storm like Hurricane Sandy has ever summoned them to death’s door.

Until now.

I just have a tough time feeling the vibe with all this, in all the years these cities have been around, this is the first time a big storm hit? F$ck that, ask George Clooney and I bet you get a different answer. Where the f$ck is Clooney on this? I will tell you where, he’s chillaxin in a Vegas suite with a Ghost Bar waitress just laughing at Hurricane Sandy. That’s what he is doing.

Why does everything have to be the “worst ever?” Philadelphia like has a statue of Rocky and Benjamin Franklin, two of the most historically American motherf#ckers ever; I doubt any storm can f$ck with that shit. Its like the media grips on to some story and doesn’t let go. And yes, I get it, this Hurricane sucks, I don’t want a bunch of Haitians showing up at my door with baseball bats or anything, I get it.

But maybe we all just calm down for like a second here? This is America, Rocky ain’t havin’ this shit. No way, no how. So now everyone take a chill pill..